The Demons We Created (Part II)

Not a single person on earth enjoys them and yet these negative emotions have been our most loyal friend, accompanying us throughout our history. Is there an upside to these dark feelings?

Jealousy, regret, and loneliness are no ordinary emotions and if not taken care of, they will backfire like nothing anyone expected.

• jealousy: unreasonable desire of everything from a target

People compare, and there's nothing wrong with spotting differences. In fact, Our parents are likely the ones that teach children to see what is and isn't the same. With comparing, comes two natural outcomes which are envy and admiration. Both of which result are neutral and are not hostile. It is perfectly fine to crave when seeing something others have or someone being better than us. To be jealous though, changes the phenomenon to aggression. In many ways, humans are very simple-minded beasts and have very unsophisticated needs. No matter how society progresses, deep down, modern man and women still carry the DNA from our ancestors who were hunter-gatherers- we just want more and more. It makes sense in ancient times because having more food means a better chance of survival but now, it's just stupid.

Everyone longs for happiness and the path towards it isn't having more but comparing less. Let's examine the lives around us for a moment. Most of us wish to look better, earn more money, go to a prestigious university. Assuming that you achieved one of the three, once comparing with one another, the satisfaction that we worked hard for is lost. Feeling jealous of others, people forget that they were absolutely happy with what they had in the first place. Some may argue that it is this force that moves humanity forward. We call it bullsh*t. The betterment of our kind should not be dominating others. Not everyone belongs to the race that may be unfairly designed.

• regret: mistakes that we hope never happened

Unlike jealousy, the damage that regret brings is passive. We've all done wrong here and there and it is exactly because of those errors that allow us to improve ourselves, assuming that there were lessons learned. That being said, it is difficult not to think about "what if" and that's where regret comes in. Time sets us up a fair game; no one is able to play twice. Imagine if everyone gets to go back to the moment when they wish to change, the world would fall into chaos. The greats couldn't do it; neither can we. No one should possess such power.

What are your moments of regret? Maybe you should have chosen a different major, career, decision or maybe it was some words you said but wished to take back. It doesn't matter anymore. The only way going forward is by looking ahead. People often get stuck with their past because of a simple reason- fear for the unknown (future). Nobody sees the future but there's no use dwelling in the past. The sole purpose of the history is for us to progress and move on.

Why did I eat so much? (ok, who typed this here!)

Why did I say that?

Why didn't I try harder?

Regret makes setback and it leads to blaming others, indecisiveness and confusion of future direction which causes staying put, wasting time and feeling failure

• loneliness: guns will kill us; words will hurt us; only loneliness will truly make us suffer.

Have you ever felt that there's nobody to talk to or to share problems with? Being lonely is no miner issue as psychologists, as well as other professionals, are doing research on it. While most studies reflect on countries such as the U.S. or the U.K., we're willing to bet that it's worldwide and something that is discovered. It showed that there's a shockingly high percentage of dying for people who feel lonely and higher if they live alone. You read it right. You can feel lonely even when being in a relationship or with others.

No one understands me.

I am the only one in the world.

If I die tomorrow, it will not matter.

It is thoughts like those that are poisonous to the minds and cut us like a slow knife with our own hands holding it. Your loved ones will all try to help but are in vain and ignored because they're behind the wall you make. On the one hand, the pain is unbearably slow and endless but on the other, it may be the only way to feel alive.

We don't have a solution to these negative aspects of life. They are impossible to solve because they're supposed to exist; we just misinterpret them. What are we saying? They're natural! Here are some of the demons we mentioned in this one, Part I and others.

• guilt- a reminder of fairness to others and to make up bad deeds

• regret- a reminder of bad decision from the past to avoid it happening in the future

• self-pity- a reminder of what we're short of in advance, it prevents/prepares us of pain

• jealousy- a reminder of having less than and the need to improve

• lonely- a reminder of the necessity of a meaningful human connection

• frustration- a reminder of being in an unfair situation and the need to for a change

• fear- a reminder of the need to change the way of dealing with threatening problems

• depression- a reminder of the need for rest both physically and mentally

• disappointment- a reminder of cherishing people, things and matters

• anger- a reminder of potential powers beneath for difficult situations

#selfreflect